I Tried
by xxCarrie-Annxx
Summary: He wanted to stop but he couldn't. The drugs kept the pain away. Partial songfic to "I Tried" by Akon and Bone Thugs-N-Harmony. Rated for drug use. Troy-centric, some Gabriella-centric in ch. 2. Contains Troyella in 2nd chapter. 2-shot.
1. Chapter 1

AN: This is my very first M-rated story, though it's not rated for sc, far from it actually. The reason it's M rated, as stated in the summary, is primarily for drug-related content. This will be a two-shot and could have a happy ending or a sad ending. I may do both and just make them alternative endings, I'm not totally sure yet, but I will have at least one ending posted sometime next week. Thanks if you review!

Disclaimer: I do not own HSM nor the song "I Tried" by Akon and Bone Thugs-N-Harmony.

_

* * *

__I try so hard can't seem to get away from misery  
Man I try so hard  
Will always be a victim of these streets  
It ain't my fault cause I...  
Tried to get away but trouble follows me  
And still I try so hard  
Hoping one day you'll come and rescue me_

_Excitement buzzed through the gymnasium as the game was down to the final three seconds. They needed two more points to win. He made his way down the final stretch. As if in slow motion, he shot. For a split second, all was still and quiet until the ball went through the hoop. "East High has won the championships!"_

That was six years ago. Then, he was barely in the prime of life at only seventeen. Now, he was a twenty-three year old man returning to his New York apartment after his last liquor run.

The man couldn't help but to laugh at the thought. Who would've thought Troy Bolton, an alcoholic who couldn't keep a job or home if his life depended on it, was once East High's MVP who led his team to a championship in high school? He chuckled at the irony as he returned to the cheap, musty, dirty New York apartment he was currently living in for this week. He was unable to drive after having his license suspended again two months ago for drunk driving. However, that didn't bother him. At least they never found the dope in his back pocket, he reminded himself.

Approaching his apartment, Troy picked up a note in the door. He groaned, knowing immediately what it was. He hadn't paid his rent in two months due to his inability to keep a job; he knew he would soon be evicted.

Throwing the note on the chair inside, he made his way to the refrigerator and placed the keg inside. Making his way to his room, he placed a small paper bag with the rest of his stash. Opening it, he smiled and grabbed his needle.

A few seconds later, after injecting the powdery substance into the needle, Troy yanked up his sleeve, revealing dozens of small bruises from his recent shoot-ups. Like a professional, he stuck the needle under his skin and let the chemicals enter his body.

Closing his eyes, Troy pulled it out and allowed the drug to give him its usual sensation. He couldn't remember ever feeling as great as he did when he was high. It was the best feeling in the world, well, second only to a woman's touch, he reminded himself.

After a few minutes, Troy made his way to the bathroom to wash his hands. For a moment, he looked in the mirror. He hadn't shaven in a few weeks and it showed; his normally shaggy-brown hair was getting even longer; his once pearly-white teeth were now yellow, a few appeared to be rotting; his once deep blue eyes looked as if they were made of glass; and his face was pale. However, none of that bothered him.

Appearance used to be of importance to him, but he was never one to obsess over how he looked. In high school, he was considered a stud and tried to keep up his appearance for the girls, one in particular. However, that was then.

Flashback

_Fifteen-year-old Troy Bolton lie sprawled out on the couch as his mother rushed through the kitchen to make him soup. For nearly a week he had been stuck at home with pneumonia. He barely felt like moving, leading him to not showering for the week._

_Suddenly, the door flung open to reveal his three best friends: Chad Danforth, Zeke Baylor and Jason Cross. Troy hadn't been expecting them, nor could he say he was pleased to have them there._

"_Whoa! We thought you were sick not dying!" Chad teased upon seeing his un-bathed friend._

"_Do you have dead rats laying around?" Jason also teased._

"_Shut up guys…."_

Troy chuckled at the memory. His old friends meant no harm; that was just them being themselves. They had been friends since Elementary school; he and Chad had been friends since preschool.

Sometimes, he wondered what became of the three. He heard Zeke had entered the catering business, and Chad had gotten married to his high school girlfriend, Taylor McKessie, but he hadn't heard much of anything else.

The four lost touch after graduation. They promised they would call, write, anything to stay together but it never happened. They had their own lives to lead which didn't involve each other anymore. It was for the best, he convinced himself.

Walking into the kitchen, Troy grabbed his last bottle of Jack Daniels, grabbed a bottle opener, and opened it with ease before swallowing a mouthful. He didn't really know what inspired him to start drinking. Maybe it was when his college roommate first offered it to him.

Flashback

_Every night from September through December, nineteen-year-old Troy Bolton watched as Chris, his college friend and roommate, snuck back to their dorm long past curfew. How he did it, Troy was unaware. Why he did it, Troy wasn't sure he wanted to know._

_One night, Troy watched from his bed as Chris staggered into their shared room. As always, it was long past curfew._

"_What the hell are you doing this late every night?" Troy snapped, tired of his friend getting away with curfew violations._

"_Relax. Don't get your panties in a knot." Chris laughed, apparently drunk as he stumbled into bed without changing._

"_Just go to sleep," Troy told him, ignoring his comments._

"_Try this, Troy," Chris told him, fumbling in his bag before finally pulling out a can of bud light._

"_No," Troy refused, turning away._

_Chris shrugged. "Your loss."_

Troy snorted at the memory. He was such a wimp back then, he thought. He had refused to drink because his now ex-girlfriend's father died in a drunk driving accident. Out of respect for her, he had refused all of Chris's attempts following that night until their official break-up two months later.

Troy took another drink. Although it was over four years ago, their final break-up was still a sore part of his memory. Gabriella Montez was his first and only real love. They were steady through their final two years of high school, but when she announced she was attending UCLA while he would remain in Albuquerque, they mutually agreed to downgrade their relationship to "just friends" until she returned after she graduated from UCLA. They kept in touch most of their first year in college. She even came home to visit him over the holidays, but they both knew this arrangement wouldn't last. However, that didn't stop him from wanting them to progress in the relationship.

A few weeks before Valentine's Day, Troy had gone out and bought an engagement ring. When she came home for summer break, he planned to propose, even if they didn't get married until after graduation. He wanted to make sure she would remain his.

The inevitable happened on Valentine's Day, he recalled. He called her to wish her a happy Valentine's Day and to ask her to reconsider going steady again, to forget her hatred of long-distance relationships. He truly believed they could make it work. However, when he called, a gruff male voice answered the phone. When Gabriella got on, she clearly stated that his name was Mark and that he was her new boyfriend. Troy was stunned and didn't reply. Instead, he hung up, never to speak to her again.

Whatever became of the engagement ring? Troy sold it to a drug dealer to fuel his heroin addiction several months after he bought it. He couldn't stand to look at it anymore; it was a constant reminder of how foolish he had been. He was never worthy enough to call himself her husband, especially not now. What was he thinking?

No matter, he thought. He didn't need her; he had heroin and liquor to keep him satisfied now. He didn't need anyone; but why was he constantly yearning for her touch?

_I try so hard can't seem to get away from misery  
Man I try so hard  
Will always be a victim of these streets  
It ain't my fault cause I...  
Tried to get away but trouble follows me  
And still I try so hard  
Hoping one day you'll come and rescue me_

He didn't care after that. He got stone-drunk with Chris that night, but that one night, they were caught and suspended indefinitely. His father screamed at him, claiming Troy threw his life away just because he had a few beers. What college student didn't drink? He thought. It didn't matter, however. Before his suspension was up, he fled to New York, never to return home.

After a year of absence, Troy called the only person he thought cared: his mother. He figured she had the right to know where he was and if he was okay. She was worried sick about him and he felt guilty, for by then, he had started with heroine. He never told her, of course. He made it apparent he was doing fine when really he was falling apart. After that call, he tried quitting for the first time. He failed to do so and never tried to call her again, not even answering when she would call. Eventually, she stopped calling as well.

Troy shook it off. Deep down, he was scared. He tried to quit heroine after a police officer almost caught him with it. Even though it had only been a few months he was on it, he couldn't escape it. Every time he would lose another job or home it seemed to be calling his name and he was right back to it once again. Finally, after seven months of failed attempts at quitting, he stopped quitting and has been a heroin addict for the last three years straight.

Alcohol was his other problem. Alcohol may have been legal, but it was a money problem. With his day-to-day not knowing whether he would have a job or home, sometimes he would spend his last dollar on liquor or heroine. They kept his pain away, that was his logic. They were his only friends. He didn't care if they could kill him.

_I try so hard can't seem to get away from misery  
Man I try so hard  
Will always be a victim of these streets  
It ain't my fault cause I...  
Tried to get away but trouble follows me  
And still I try so hard  
Hoping one day you'll come and rescue me_


	2. Chapter 2

An: Sorry it took longer than expected to post this. I was given the idea to do a 3rd part to this besides my alternative ending, so I posted a poll in my profile if you want a part 3. If I do, I'll post part 3 _then_ the alternative ending. Thanks for reading!

Disclaimer: HSM is not mine.

* * *

_"Promise you'll wait for me?" _

"_I promise as long as long as you remain faithful to me."_

"_Promise."_

As Gabriella Montez took her first steps in Albuquerque in nearly six years, a wave of familiarity washed over her. In all the places she had lived, this had been the only place she had ever been able to call 'home'.

However, in that moment, 'home' seemed foreign. As she looked around town, everything seemed the same though it felt different.

Suddenly, the doors of the airport flung open and before she could react, she was being squeezed to death by her old best friend.

"Gabi! Oh my god, it's so great to see you!" Taylor McKessie fussed, her husband Chad Danforth standing off to the side.

"It's so great to see you too!" Gabriella cried, tears of joy filling both of their eyes.

Pulling away, the girls took a moment to fully take in the other's appearance. Upon seeing Taylor's stomach, Gabriella smiled. "Expecting?"

"I'm five months along!" Taylor answered excitedly.

"Oh my gosh! That's great!" she said, hugging her once more. "I'm invited to the birth, right?"

"Of course," Chad piped in, grinning. "Dr. Montez."

"Hey, it's not official yet, Chad," she told him, although she was beaming.

"Well, you can learn all about delivering babies," he replied.

Gabriella laughed. "Chad, I already went through med school. Don't you think I already know that?"

"Oh yeah!" Chad realized.

Taylor laughed at the two. "Well, let's get going. I'm sure you're tired after your flight."

"Not really. I slept through most of it," she replied. "So, how is everyone else?"

"Let me guess, you're really only wondering about a certain Bolton?" Taylor queried.

Although she tried to hide it, Gabriella knew they had her. "Mainly."

"I haven't heard from him in God knows when," Chad stated, his tone saddened suddenly. "We promised we'd stay in touch but it didn't last long."

"I stayed in touch with him for a while," Gabriella told them.

"Until he hung up on you?" Taylor presumed.

Gabriella nodded as a tear glided down her cheek from the painful memory. "He found out I was seeing someone else after I promised him I wouldn't date. I know I hurt him, but I didn't know I would have hurt him that much."

"I talk to his parents occasionally," Chad started. "They told me he's currently in Bronx, New York after he dropped out of college, after being suspended for drinking."

Gabriella gasped. New York? Of all places, why there? She wondered, horrified. And, since when did he drink? He knew how upset she was on the subject. Then again, he probably didn't care about her thoughts; _if_ he remembered.

_Flashback_

"…_Sh, Gabi, it's okay," Seventeen-year-old Troy Bolton soothed his crying girlfriend._

"_No, it's not!" Gabriella cried, wiping her eyes. "He's gone! It's not fair!"_

_Gently yet firmly, Troy lifted her chin and looked her straight in the eyes. "Life's not always fair. It throws us obstacles all the time but we just need to gather our strength and overcome them. Brie, I know this is difficult for you, but I'm going to be there helping you as much as I can. Why? Because I love you."_

_Clinging to him tighter, Gabriella buried her head in the crock of his neck. "Don't drink, ever. Promise me? I don't want another loved one to go like that, especially when they're the drunk."_

"_I promise," he assured her, closing his eyes as he held her as tightly as he could. "I'll never break it."_

On the way to the Danforths' home, the three stayed quiet. Gabriella mulled over what she should do, if she should go to New York or leave Troy alone and enjoy her stay in Albuquerque. She still loved Troy dearly, and she wanted to tell him that she was sorry for breaking her promise. On the other hand, did he still love her? Did he want to see her? After all, she broke his heart. He wouldn't want her around to open up old wounds.

"If you want to go see him, talk to his mom to find out his exact location," Chad told her, reading her mind.

"But, I don't know if I should. I mean, what if he's happy? I don't want to ruin it," Gabriella replied.

"Gabi, just try. Spend a week or so here with us then go to New York and try to bring him home. Besides, Chad really wants him here for the birth of our son," Taylor assured her. "We want you both there so when you guys get married and start making babies you'll have it all down."

Gabriella blushed crimson, remembering the one incident where she _thought_ she was pregnant. She was too embarrassed to tell anyone about it, but, after their senior prom, she and Troy were at her home, alone, and the two got carried away and ended up sleeping together, without protection. It was the best night of her life, and she could still feel his hands touching her everywhere whenever she thought about it. However, soon after she was hit in the face with reality.

They hadn't used any protected, she remembered. Her period was one week late and she had been terrified. She refused to tell Troy, knowing they were about to separate for at least four years. Instead, she went to get an at-home pregnancy test kit. Luckily, the result came back negative. She had refused to sleep with him after that incident.

"Bah, Tay, that's why she went to med school," Chad told her, causing the two girls to laugh hysterically.

"Chad, I definitely missed you," Gabriella told him, smiling slightly.

* * *

For three days, Gabriella stayed with Chad and Taylor and helped Taylor around the house a bit while remising about the last several years together and apart. It was a difficult decision for her to make, but on the fourth day, Gabriella asked Chad to take her to the Bolton's residence.

Nervously, Gabriella stood outside the doorway and contemplated whether or not to take the next step. She had the right to be scared, she thought. What if they blamed her for Troy's leaving?

"Just knock," Chad told her. "Or I will."

Hesitantly, Gabriella knocked twice on the door and waited for someone to come. After several seconds, Lucille answered.

Upon seeing the two, Lucy smiled warmly and ushered them inside. "Gabriella, it's so nice to see you! Chad, you too! I wasn't expecting company or else I would've--"

"Mrs. Bolton, it's okay," Gabriella told her, smiling, feeling more at ease. "Sorry for dropping in like this, but I just needed to ask you some things."

"Well, sit down," Lucy instructed. "And, you know better than to call me Mrs. Bolton."

Chad and Gabriella took seats on the couch and Lucy took a chair facing the two. "Thanks. Um, Lucy, I was wondering if you could tell me where exactly is Troy…."

Lucy's eyes suddenly started watering up. "I…I knew this would come up…."

"Don't you know where he is?" Chad asked her. "You did before."

"Yes, I did, but he keeps changing his location. I couldn't keep up so after a year long wild goose chase, I just gave up…."

Gabriella bit her bottom lip and looked disappointed at the floor. "I-I want to see him."

Lucy sighed. "He's probably still in New York, but where exactly I'm not sure."

Gabriella nodded. "I _want_ to find him."

"Honey, you'll be searching till you're dead," she told her. "He could be anywhere by now."

Suddenly, the phone began to ring but Lucy ignored it, figuring it wasn't an emergency. "Uh, shouldn't you answer that?" Chad asked her.

"Probably a telemarketer, but if it means that much to you…" Lucy checked the caller ID but didn't recognize the number. However, something about it compelled her to answer.

"Hello," she greeted.

Gabriella didn't understand why but in two seconds, she watched as Lucy started crying uncontrollably. Chad rushed to her side and comforted her as he tossed the phone to Gabriella. Unsure as to what to do, Gabriella put the phone to her ear and listened.

"Mom, are you there?" a hoarse male voice asked. Gabriella gasped, tears filling her own eyes.

"T-Troy?" she stuttered.

"Who is this?" he asked, sounding irritated.

"I-it's me, Troy, Gabriella," she answered quietly. "Where-" Suddenly, the line went dead.

By now, Lucy had calmed herself but now Gabriella was a sobbing mess. Chad ran back to her shortly and hugged her comfortingly. Now more than ever she wanted to see Troy, and she planned to search until the end of time to find him.

* * *

Troy watched sullenly as several men removed his belongings from his now former home. It had been one month since he received his last eviction notice, meaning his time was up tomorrow. However, he wasn't worried one bit.

He had a new plan. Instead of searching for a new job and home constantly, his good friend and drug supplier, Oscar, offered him a job _and_ agreed to let him stay with him until he was back on his feet. It was even riskier to sell then use, but Troy was willing to take that chance.

As the movers made their way to his room, Troy gritted his teeth, praying that they didn't find any signs of heroine. He had given Oscar what was lefty for safe keeping, but he knew he could've easily left some behind by mistake.

To his relief, no evidence of heroine was found. At least, the movers never mentioned it. Once they were gone not long after, Troy glanced at the place one last time before setting off, on foot, to Oscar's apartment.

Troy sighed as the hot summer sun hit his face. He enjoyed walking for exercise, but he hated long distances in the heat. However, fortunately, Oscar had taken the heroine and beer the night before to his apartment meaning he had nothing to carry now. The mover's were taking what was left to a thrift shop, seeing as Troy didn't have much to begin with. Besides, he was moving in with Oscar, what did he need so much?

'_Her,'_ he thought miserably. It had been three and a half weeks since he heard her voice and he longed to hear it again. However, he hung up on her as he had done years ago. When he heard her, he was on the verge of breaking down, and after hanging up, that's exactly what he did.

As Troy made his way down several blocks, he paid no attention to the black car creeping up behind him until it passed him, but he didn't notice it at the time. He watched uninterested as it parked in a business parking lot and the driver got out of the car. He gasped when he saw the driver. Even though he hadn't seen her in years, he knew Gabriella Montez anywhere.

Troy shrugged it away, knowing it couldn't possibly be her. However, the girl, whoever she was, raced up to him, meaning it had to be her. Troy tried to run but part of him yearned for her even more. The yearning made it impossible to escape her.

"Troy Michael Bolton!" she yelled, tears streaming down her face.

"How the hell did you find me?" he snapped.

Gabriella was taken aback by his tone, for he had never spoken to her like that no matter how angry he was.

"I have been searching New York since your phone call over three weeks ago!" she cried, coming closer until she was within two feet of him. "Please, let me inside! Troy, I know I hurt you, and I'm extremely sorry! I want to make it right again, but you need to tell me how. Please, Troy, I still love you."

"If you loved me then why were you with other guys, huh?" he barked, shrugging off her attempts to hug him.

"It was a mistake! I told you I'm sorry!" she cried. "I never stopped loving you. Now, please come home."

"I am going home," he told her bitterly. "My home isn't there."

Gabriella sighed. "Let me at least drive you to wherever it is."

Reluctantly, he agreed and followed her to her car. "Where is it you're going?" she asked him.

"Turn left at the stop sign," he instructed. "Then I'll tell you which building."

Gabriella nodded, doing as she was told.

"How did you find me?" he asked suddenly.

"I asked around," she replied, shrugging.

"How did you know it was me?" he questioned.

Gabriella sighed. "My heart told me it was you." As he directed her to the building, she parked and looked at him closely. She now saw why he didn't think she would recognize him. His skin was pale, his hair a mess, his eyes looked like glass, and he had done a reckless job shaving. However, she, unlike most, could still tell he was Troy Bolton. The heart inside of him was still the same exact heart belonging to Troy Bolton. Beneath the exterior, behind the glass look in his eyes, she still saw her funny, sweet and loving Troy Bolton she used to know.

"So, this is where you live," she started, gazing at the old apartment complex.

"You could say that," he replied as the two got out. Gabriella shrieked when a rat passed her, but Troy laughed.

"You see a lot of that here," he told her, leading her to the building. Suddenly, he remembered what was in Oscar's apartment. Not only was he a drug dealer, but he was also a pimp. Even though Oscar was on the streets, girls were still in and out of his apartment. What if Gabriella saw that and accused him of being a pimp or something else, possibly worse?

"Oh by the way, I share this place with Oscar, a friend of mine," he stated, leading her inside. "He has girls coming in and out all day."

Gabriella nodded silently as Troy unlocked the door and led her inside. Troy bit his bottom lip, hoping she didn't find anything she wasn't supposed to find. The apartment was a bit nicer than the one Troy used to have, but it was still trashed. Cases of alcohol lay in several places and other odds and ends lay everywhere. Gabriella grabbed his arm upon seeing another rat running around.

"You've become a heavy drinker, haven't you?" she asked quietly.

Troy nodded feeling slightly ashamed, knowing there was no use lying to her. He expected her to yell, but instead he got the disappointed look that always made him feel guilty.

"Anything else I should know?" she asked him.

"No," he lied, leading her to his room. The room wasn't done and the ceiling was cracked but it was better than living on the streets, he thought. The room was gray with only a cot in the middle, a few cases of beer and a brown paper bag. "I just moved in yesterday which is why nothing is here," he explained.

"What's in the bag?" she asked him, eyeing the brown, paper bag.

"Uh…nothing," he lied.

Gabriella could tell he was lying but let it go for the moment. "By the way, why are you wearing long sleeves in this heat?"

Troy gulped, knowing he was caught. "Um…um…it was cold earlier."

Gabriella gave him an 'I'm not stupid' look before reaching out and grabbing his hand. Before he could react, she yanked up his sleeve to reveal tiny bruises going all the way up his arm. She gasped, fearing the worst.

"Now you see?" he snapped, withdrawing his arm. "So I'm into dope. Send me to jail, I don't care."

Gabriella shook her head, tears filling her eyes. It couldn't be, she thought. Her rock couldn't have turned to drugs. They just weren't him.

"You need help," she told him quietly, reaching out to hold him but he refused.

"I need nobody's help, especially not yours," he retorted. "You've done enough damage."

"I'm sorry about what happened! Mike is gone! I only want to be with you!" she cried. "I made a mistake, but don't kill yourself to teach me a lesson! I'm not worth it."

"What makes you think I should forgive you? I bought you an engagement ring! I wanted to marry you!" he yelled.

Gabriella looked shocked momentarily. He never told her that or else it may have been different.

Holding in his pain, Troy watched as she went to the bag and pulled out his needle. He watched in confusion as she injected the heroin before turning to him. "What do I have to do? Use it myself for you to forgive me and love me again? Because, I will."

Troy watched as she put the needle dangerously close to her skin before it finally dawned on him. "Don't, Brie!"

Gabriella stopped, holding in her triumph. "So I can't but you can?"

"Don't be like me," he told her, his eyes filling with tears. "You deserve better than me! Go home and marry a clean, sober man who'll love you unconditionally! Don't waste anymore time on me!"

Silently, Gabriella took the bag and needle to the bathroom and quickly flushed it down the toilet. When she returned, Troy was a sobbing mess.

Gently, Gabriella wrapped her arms around him and rubbed his back. "We can turn this around," she whispered in his ear.

"You don't know that!" he yelled, wanting to push her away but he wanted this even more. It had been so long since he had been in her arms; he never wanted her to let go. He was so used to being her rock, but now she was his. She could save him, he thought.

"A very wise young man once told me something when I was seventeen," she recalled. "Life's not always fair. It throws us obstacles all the time but we just need to gather our strength and overcome them. I know this is difficult for you, but I'm going to be there helping you as much as I can. Why? Because I love you."

"Me." He remembered saying this to her the night her father died, the night he promised her he would never drink.

Gabriella nodded. "I can't let you give up. I'm taking you back to Albuquerque and I'll get you help. I'm in the process of finding a home and a job near there. Please, come back with me."

Troy nodded, clutching her hand in fear. Gabriella kissed his forehead and spoke, "Chad and Taylor want us to be there for the birth of their son. There's one reason to return home."

"I have another now," he told her, wiping his eyes. "You."


End file.
